January 30, 2012

2012

A new year, a new beginning, a new place, a new life, a new boyfriend. And yes, you didn't read it wrongly.

I was with Axel for 2yrs 4months, and our last day together was on 9 Jan. It was supposed to be earlier but he have requested to spend a last few days together and end on our anniversary that we got together, which was on 9 Sept 2009. 09/09/2009 was a special date to us, which means forever and ever in chinese.

Axel was a great man who took great care of me and loved me deeply. He took so great care of me that I wanted to give him the best too and in order to do that, I have changed and adjust myself so much in order to avoid disagreements or unhappiness till the extend that I started to lose myself. I started to feel controlled and restricted, but it's all my fault. I should not have kept giving in and avoiding disagreements. Now I have realised that disagreements are actually good as it will make relationships stronger and allow each other to understand and each other more. Thus, I decided I want to leave and move on, leaving him heartbroken and distorted. I had no choice as I have lost all the special feelings I used to have for him and it's not his fault at all.

Now, moving to a new place to live on my own, I have alot to plan and to move on. Feel pretty sad for the loss of our special date, our special feelings, and all the special moments we had. It have been a wonderful time in my life which I will keep deep inside my memory for the rest of my life. I am sorry Axel, you're one of the best man I have ever met. Too bad I'm not the best one for you and I do believe you will find the perfect woman you need in your life. I wish you all the best.

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